Every Nigerian has been at that one ceremony — whether it’s a naming, a burial, or a traditional wedding — where somebody grabs the microphone and suddenly transforms into Pastor, Imam, and relationship counsellor all at once. Nobody sent for them. Nobody asked. But here they are, preaching with full confidence.
Well, Theresa Bassey just got married, and she is giving us the full gist of what happened when the chairman at her traditional wedding decided to use the occasion to deliver an unsolicited sermon on wifely submission.
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The Chairman Took a Detour Nobody Asked For
You know how it goes. The traditional wedding is in full swing — the colours are popping, the asoebi is immaculate*, the food is fragrant, and the DJ is on standby. Then the chairman, who was supposed to be *coordinating the event, suddenly catches the Holy Ghost and pivots into full-blown preacher mode.
According to Theresa, the chairman zeroed in on the bride — as they always do — and began the age-old Nigerian wedding tradition of publicly instructing the new wife on the art of submission, presumably while the groom sat comfortably and nodded along.
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The Asoebi Girls Stood Their Ground
Now, here is where the story gets delicious.
Theresa revealed that she and her asoebi girls were absolutely not here for it. Rather than sit quietly and smile through the lecture like brides are traditionally expected to do, the squad made their feelings known — and Theresa has been sharing the details online to the delight of many Nigerians who are clearly tired of weddings being turned into gender studies lectures nobody registered for.
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Why This Conversation Matters
Let’s be honest — this is a scene that plays out at nearly every Nigerian traditional wedding. The chairman, an elder, or some self-appointed spokesperson inevitably singles out the bride to remind her to:
– Cook for her husband
– Be submissive
– Manage her tongue
– Basically, disappear into the role of “good wife”
Meanwhile, the groom rarely receives the same energy. Nobody is reminding him to be faithful, to communicate, or to show up emotionally for his partner. The double standard is loud.
More Nigerian women — and their friends — are beginning to push back against this narrative, and Theresa’s wedding is just the latest example of a shifting tide.
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The Internet Has Thoughts
Nigerians on social media have been sharing their own experiences in response to Theresa’s story, with many women revealing similar moments at weddings where they bit their tongues — or, like Theresa’s crew, did not.
The conversation is a reminder that culture is not static. Nigerian traditions are rich, beautiful, and worth celebrating — but that does not mean every aspect must go unquestioned, especially when it consistently places the burden of a successful marriage entirely on the woman’s shoulders.
Theresa, we see you. And clearly, so does the entire internet. 👏
What do you think — should chairmen and elders be called out when they go off-script at weddings? Drop your thoughts in the comments below!
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