Summary: Nigerian doctor Zainab Usman has sparked conversation online with her candid advice to men about what to consider before walking down the aisle. Here’s what she had to say.
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Marriage is a serious business — anybody who has attended an Owambe wedding knows that the celebration is only the beginning of a lifelong journey. And while many Nigerian men spend months planning the perfect wedding, a Nigerian doctor is urging them to spend even more time planning the marriage itself.
Dr. Zainab Usman, a Nigerian medical professional, has taken to the internet with some bold and candid advice for men who are considering settling down. Her message? Do your due diligence before you say “I do.”
What Did the Doctor Say?
Dr. Usman advised men to take a closer look at the character and lifestyle of their prospective partners before committing to marriage. Specifically, she urged men to be certain about who they are truly marrying — beyond the church introduction, the family visits, and the carefully curated Instagram photos.
“Before you get married, make sure your wife is not a lesbian, likewise a wild woman,” she stated pointedly.
Why This Advice Is Stirring Conversation
In a society where marriage is considered a cornerstone of life — where aunties at every family gathering never miss a chance to ask “So when are you bringing someone home?” — Dr. Usman’s words have hit a nerve.
Her advice touches on a reality that many Nigerians often sweep under the carpet: that people do not always present their authentic selves during courtship. From Lagos to Kano, countless stories exist of marriages that crumbled because couples simply did not truly know each other before walking down the aisle.
The Bigger Picture: Know Who You Are Marrying
Beyond the specific points raised by Dr. Usman, her advice opens up a broader and important conversation about intentional courtship. Before marriage, relationship experts consistently advise that couples should:
– Communicate openly about values, expectations, and lifestyle
– Spend meaningful time together in real-life situations, not just dates
– Involve trusted family and friends who can offer honest observations
– Seek premarital counselling — whether through a pastor, imam, or licensed therapist
– Ask the hard questions rather than avoiding uncomfortable conversations
As the popular Yoruba saying goes, “Ile ni ajo, orun ni ile” — but while we’re here on earth, choosing the right life partner remains one of the most important decisions a person will ever make.
Final Thoughts
Dr. Usman’s advice, however blunt, serves as a reminder that marriage deserves far more than surface-level preparation. Nigerian men — and women — would do well to invest as much energy into knowing their partner deeply as they do into the aso-ebi, the hall booking, and the wedding cake flavour.
Because at the end of the day, the owambe lasts one weekend. The marriage lasts a lifetime.
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What do you think about Dr. Usman’s advice? Drop your thoughts in the comments below!
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